Marie´s Blog

As a social being, we need other people to talk and enjoy life with. I have been always asked by many Chinese friends specially girls on how to get to socialize in parties. Parties depends on the theme. So this is just based on my experience and what I discovered during the times when I get to go to parties.

Clothes

The way to wear clothes may affect the magnetism of acquaintance in the party. It adds up confidence. So it is important to know which clothes to wear. One should wear appropriate clothes that fits depending on the party. Asks first what kind of party is it. It might be formal party where everyone is required to wear formal attire. Or if it is just an informal house party just to get reunited with old friends and meet new friends, then no need to wear formal clothes. Do not bring a lot of things that will look like going to camping. Bring something small as possible. Celphones, your house key, rubbers(in case you get to like somebody in the party)  or enough money and business cards are the basic thing. Bringing a bottle of wine for house parties or food of specialty will give plus points to get invited again for another planned party.

Tip for women: Men are visual, if intention of going to a party is to find men, wear something sexy but elegant.

Tip for men: Women are more focused on how men talk. They are more influenced  on how men say how beautiful they are.

The Talk

When in a party, grab a drink and let it start a conversation. The drink works as an ice breaker and as a shyness combatant. Learn to listen. Try to talk. Avoid nosy questions. Not all people in the party are as friendly as expected to be and if it turns out that one  feels out of place, then just stand there and drink and feel like there is something to do. But as much as possible pretend that all people in the party are friends with each other. Act like everyone there is or should be your friend.

Start remembering and calling  people by their names so they will feel comfortable. Talk anything to either from the clothes they wear, their favorite food or their pets. This kind of talk is only good if there is a feeling of not anticipating what people will think about after the party or else they might be thinking something weird to talk with a person that no one knew and pops-up to parties without getting invited.  OR, if their memory is foggy the next day from drinking they may just think “Whoa who is this really fun person that is oddly in so many of my good memories of the night. they MUST be cool.  I think I want to be friends with them”. Either way one will have alot more fun as a result then just lurking in the background.

Worst Case

If there is a situation where totally there is a feeling of social outcast, then find the person who is really really drunk and have fun talking with them. Surprisingly, there is a very interesting stuff about drunk people though they won’t bother to asks if they know who they are talking with.

Don’t forget to say thanks to the hosts of the party after the event even though its the first time acquaintance. Party hosts have tendency to organize parties again so they will remember people to get listed in the invites.